Friday, June 29, 2012

Don't talk to strangers

When I was a kid I was taught don't don't talk to strangers, in fact I was told to avoid them. Times have changed, now most of the world revolves around starngers interacting. We actually want strangers to follow us! On twitter we get excited when some random like teenybopper_5 starts reading our clever thoughts. There are social networking sites like facebook for when you meet a person for 5 minutes and you are now "friends" or foursquare so people can legally stalk you. I work in business development and I spend hours upon hours a day finding information about potential contacts that my clients can do business with. They are all strangers but that doesn't matter. I have went from avoid strangers to talk to as many as possible.  


I thought about some of my closest friends and at one point they were all strangers to me. I knew absolutely nothing about them and they knew nothing about me but someone we connected. Now some of my friends know me better than I know myself. My perspective on whether strangers are bad or good has changed. As a kid if I didn't know you I politely smile but I will block you out like you were a 10 foot monster. Now in my wise old age I write my thought on the internet and openly let strangers in. Whether my mom reads this or some girl in Indonesia reads  my ramblings I am  not going to be affected any different. So what does that say about my view on strangers? Well in my opinion I love strangers! The fact that there are so many people out there that I don't know excites me. It means there is so much potential for more in the world. 


Recently one of my best friends started hanging out with this guy, they are still in the lovey dovey stages when    every time the phone vibrates she gets a smile and she gets butterflies or what I call the happy flu. Where things are perfect. I absolutely love that, it is what girls dream about when they are little about having someone think you are special and see the extraordinary person you are inside and out. When I see young love growing like that is makes me smile, neither of them were looking for affection out of desperation it came naturally (and unexpectedly). It is a love in its purest form, so selfless and beautiful. 


Unfortunately not all love is this way and some people battle with the desire to be loved and will do nearly anything to find it. The fact is people are people, some do more good than others and some do more bad but that doesn't affect whether I should love them or not. There is a MASSIVE difference between showing someone love and being in-love with them. With things like online dating and all this mushy gooshy hollywood crud love can be easily tainted. What I am saying is people want to be told they matter, people want to feel significant. So when people are shown the affection they crave they are going to be drawn towards it, sometimes no matter where it comes from. Living in a part of the world where over 50% of marriages end in divorce, people have been disillusioned by broken homes and left with an unquenchable desire to be wanted. "Don't talk to strangers" goes out the window and people go searching for the love that was absent in a home where you thought it should be. "Stranger" becomes irrelevant and feelings jump into the driver seat. The source of the affection becomes less of an issue and the love, even in its cheapest form, becomes the motivation.    


The desire for love is an overwhelming feeling and the search for it can be beyond destructive. Time after time I have spoke with people who started with rock solid standards and morals then as disappointment creeped in. As the people that were supposed to be there for them failed those morals slowly disintegrated. Strangers because the first ones they would talk to the ones they desired to be around because they got the temporary satisfaction they craved. 


When I meet new people I challenge myself not to look at them for who people have said they are or even who the person says they are. I look into their eyes, not in a creepy I shall read into your soul way but, to see what is behind the words and outward facade. Underneath no one is perfect every stranger you meet, every person you get to know will have something in common with the other 7 billion people on the planet.


Every single person on the planet is amazing, intricate and beautiful. Each one desires to be loved.


People want to be cherished so here is a challenge to you don't talk to strangers, listen to strangers and above absolutely everything else love them.      

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